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SCD Blog Week 5

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Andrew View Drop Down

Joined: 04 Oct 2014
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    Posted: 25 Oct 2015 at 11:04
Greetings, everyone - *hopefully* I won’t be as grumpy this week as my itch has gone away after two weeks of torture – I opened a bottle of red to celebrate last night.

I’m still a bit grumpy though – mostly because two teenagers with masks on came to our door earlier and said ‘trick or treat’ – I reminded them that the tedious Hallowe’en wasn’t for another week – apparently they’re on holiday then, so we’re expected to give them sweets for dressing up now! I was about to reject their plea when the wife, clearly angry I burnt last night’s dinner and hoping to get revenge, gave them every piece of chocolate I like in the house – and I was saving them for tonight’s show!

We’re sat here with chicken and chips as the show comes on – and very soon, my mood is instantly lowered by seeing Daly and Winklepicker – I’m not a fan of either of them, you might’ve guessed.

Right, who's on first? It's Georgia & Giovanni:-
It was certainly a lively dance, I'll give them that - I almost wanted to get on my feet and have a go myself. Yuck - we got a new HD TV during the week and I can see all his sweat. They're not the most exciting people when they're off the floor, are they?

Carol & Pasha:-
As much as I like her, she's clearly not the best dancer. Oh shut up, Bruno, you old ninny - I find you as entertaining as, in your own words, a 'cleaning session'. I expect Old Pa Goodman will say 'yer came out' - yes, he did! I'm getting grumpy again - calm down Andrew, it could be worse, they could make Daly and Winklepicker judges and make Dreary Bussell and Bruno the hosts!

I remember when I enjoyed this show!

Anita & Gleb:-
I seem to be going off the pair of them - Gleb foolishly flirting with Winklepicker last week started that. He better not do that this week! Well, her dancing is ok, but are all those lifts allowed? Of course, this'll be ignored by the expert judges! I remember the old days of the show, when Old Pa Goodman would've given them a right telling off and docked them a few points as well, not gushed over them! Ridiculous marks!

Sorry for the grumpiness - most of you will know I'm not really enthralled with the show at the moment!

Peter & Janette:-
What a crashing bore he is - I better get earmuffs so I don't hear his monotone voice and die of boredom! She seems to be dancing round him - it doesn't look that good to me! They seem to be in fits of giggles at the Italian irritant Bruno - they must find him 100x funnier than me. I thought their dance was as romantic as a particularly infected spot!

Kirsty & Brendan:-
Oh stop moaning! It looked better than her usual standard to me - I'm not struck on her but you can see she's trying hard - I must be turning soft! Old Pa Goodman penalized them for the faffing about - I notice he didn't criticize that bore Gleb for two lifts! Winklepicker, you ninny - don't say the J-word!

Ainsley & Natalie:-
The jive - dear me, this won't be good! Never mind, it was good fun and *much* more entertaining than the two crashing bores earlier who got gushed over, even if it was a bit flat footed. I love Ainsley, he's giving everything a good go, and Natalie is wonderful as always!

Jamelia & Tristan:-
Can't stand her - neither can the wife, she put her off 'Loose Women'! No doubt she'll be back to her usual lousy standard after a (I reluctantly admit) good dance last week - and it doesn't look great to my amateur eye! It looked like Tristan was dragging around an ironing board and I nearly fell asleep - the wife gave me one of her hard slaps to bring me back!

Katie & Anton:-
The berk doing the salsa - this should be a laugh! She's better than him - much better, in fact - it's a big shame, because if Katie was with someone like Ian or Matthew she could be brilliant, but the Berk's lousy Latin is not doing her any favours. They're both full of themselves - it would've been funny if they'd asked her daughter to give a score and she gave them '1' or '2'! Stop cracking jokes Anton - they're about as funny as an outbreak of the plague!

Jeremy & Karen:-
Hooray - something to put a smile on my face. Well, it's certainly not failing in doing that - yes, I know I'm biased - it wasn't great. Oh shut up Craig, you nitpicking ninny! Yes, he did have a lovely smile, Darcey - not everyone's as dreary as you! The Italian irritant is in a bad mood tonight - maybe he didn't manage to get to the green room bar before the show!

Helen & Aljaz:-
It was good, very good in fact, but I must've been wrong about the green room bar as the judges are gushing so enthusiastically I wonder if she's hired a hypnotist - if she's so (apparently) unpopular with the others it wouldn't surprise me! Even if these rumours are true, I still enjoy watching her - and she's a bouncy little thing.

Jay & Aliona:-
Can't stand him - I nearly fell asleep again when he was playing table tennis with the other 'Wanted' member! Well I suppose it was good for a plank of wood - but not a fan of her choreography, and the synchronized gushing (except from Old Pa Goodman) irritates me no end. Goodness me, Bruno got a bit carried away there - bring in the sedative nurse!

Kellie & Kevin:-
Hooray - been looking forward to this pair. Me and the wife enjoyed the dance so much we got up and had a go ourselves, which wasn't a good idea, as we knocked over a painting on the wall - thankfully it didn't break, and Martha the cat - clearly disturbed by the stomping coming from the living room rushed to the room and knocked over a mug of tea before giving us a satisfied look and sitting on my chair smugly - nearly scalding my foot in the process. We missed the judges comments - but I caught the score and it was well deserved!

Thanks for reading - apologies if it wasn't very funny this week, but I'm still knackered after very little sleep yesterday.

See you later for the spoiler!
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